Chapter 5
21696: He bequeathed one-third of his wealth to
his daughters as a punishment to his son for taking all
the money
Question:
One year before my father died, he gave to each of us
_ three daughters and one son _ the papers pertaining
to the accounts where he had deposited the money he
had been saving for us; he had suffered a great deal
during the years he was working abroad to save this money
for us and provide us with this money. So none of us dared
to withdraw any money without referring to him, out
of respect for him.
Then my brother withdrew all the money in the
account following an argument which arose between my
brother and my sister. My father (may Allaah have mercy on
him) was on the girls' side, which made my brother (may
Allaah forgive him) withdraw all the money which my
father had deposited in his account then handed over
the documentation. When he (my brother) found out
about this will, he started court proceedings to prove the
will legally invalid. When his father found out about it
from the bank, he was deeply shocked, and he told him to
put the money back because he needed it, as he was sick.
But my brother refused to return the money, which had a
bad effect on my father. My father died angry with my
brother, and he had written a will leaving one-third of his
money to his daughters; this will was intended as a
punishment to my brother which my father wrote before he
died, understanding fully what he was saying. I myself
refused to accept this will because I was not comfortable with
it, and I insisted on taking only that which was due to
me according to sharee'ah. I advised my sisters to ignore
this will, in order to correct any mistake that my father
may have made and so as to uphold good relations with
my brother as Allaah enjoins upon us to do. But my
many attempts did not succeed, and they went ahead
and executed the will through the courts. The tears of
my mother (may Allaah have mercy on her) did not
succeed in deterring them from insisting on the will
being executed. I also tried several times to deter my
brother from entering into a dispute with my sisters in the
court, in order to protect the name and reputation of our
father. I asked him to consider this as a punishment in this
world for what he had done to my father. But he refused to
give up what he considered to be his right for any reason,
and all of them accused me of not supporting the truth. I
kept myself out of this dispute by appointing a lawyer to
declare my objection to this matter from the outset.
I hope that you can advise me of the shar'i ruling
and what my siblings' position is according to
sharee'ah. Please tell me what my duty towards them is, when
they have adopted this stance towards me on this matter
despite my many attempts to maintain good relations with
them and honour them.
Please advise me, may Allaah reward you.
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
It is unfortunate that there are many such cases
among siblings, and what makes the matter even more
regrettable is that the reason for this dispute is money. In fact
I appreciate our sister's good nature and wisdom, since
she has preferred peace to entering into a dispute with
her brother, and she has tried to contain the problem and
solve it within the family. This in itself should be
considered the beginning of a proper solution. As for the answer
to this question, it may be answered in the following points:
Firstly:
The money which your father had saved for you and
gone to great lengths for your benefit, is the due of
everyone whom Allaah has decreed has a share of inheritance.
Each of you has a share allotted by sharee'ah after the death
of your father; none of you have the right to keep this
money for himself and deny it to the rest of the heirs, because
by doing so he is transgressing upon the rights of
others. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"but transgress not the limits. Truly, Allaah likes not
the transgressors"[al-Baqarah 2:190]
It was narrated by Abu Harrah al-Raqaashi that his
paternal uncle said: "I was holding on to the reins of the
she-camel of Messenger of Allaah SAWS (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him), and the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "A man's wealth is
not permissible except with his consent." (Narrated
by Ahmad, 20172; classed as saheeh al-Albaani in
Saheeh al-Irwaa', 1761).
On this basis, what your brother did by taking this
money is considered to be a haraam action, especially since
he took the money when your father was still alive and he
is not entitled to any of the money until after his father
died. Indeed, after his father's death he is not entitled to
anything more than the share which Allaah has allocated to him
in the laws of inheritance. So what your brother must do
is to repent to Allaah and restore the rights of people.
Secondly:
The will which your father wrote was not
acceptable according to sharee'ah, and it is not permissible for
you to demand that it be executed, because a person who
is designated as an heir according to sharee'ah cannot
be given something in the will (wasiyyah). The
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
"Allaah has given each person his rights and no will can be
made in favour of an heir." (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi,
2120; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh
al-Tirmidhi, 1722), So it is not permissible for you to demand it,
even if your brother has taken your money. But you
may demand what Allaah has granted you in the laws
of inheritance.
Thirdly:
You should continue to advise and guide them and try
to bring them together as much as you can. Remember
that you will be rewarded by Allaah for that. Allaah
says (interpretation of the meaning):
"There is no good in most of their secret talks save
(in) him who orders Sadaqah (charity in Allaah's Cause),
or Ma`roof (Islamic Monotheism and all the good
and righteous deeds which Allaah has ordained), or conciliation between mankind; and he who does
this, seeking the good Pleasure of Allaah, We shall give him
a great reward"
[al-Nisa' 4:114]
Keep telling your sisters not to demand more than
they are entitled to, and that demanding one-third is
something that is not permitted. Try also to convince your
brother, in a good way, to give your sisters that which is
rightfully theirs, and to show mercy to his sisters after his
father's death instead of being a torment to them. You
will undoubtedly face problems in doing that, but be
patient. We ask Allaah to make you steadfast.
Fourthly:
If you are doing the right thing, it will not matter if
people blame you or accuse you of being biased. Be steadfast
in adhering to the truth. Finally, we call on all of you to
fear Allaah and to ward off this scandalous dispute which
does not make anyone happy apart from the Shaytaan, those
in whose hearts is a disease and everyone who enjoys
the troubles of others or is filled with malicious envy.
I ask Allaah to put things right between you. May
Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
10362: The closest of people to her raped her
Question:
She was raped by her father and was no longer
considered a virgin, then she had an illicit relationship with a
man. Then she repented and performed `Umrah, and she
wants to get married. What should she do, and should she
tell her husband?
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
She should praise Allaah for the blessings of
guidance and be steadfast in adhering to the truth. She should do
a lot of acts of worship and obedience. She should try
her utmost not to be alone with her father in the house.
She does not have to tell her husband about what
happened, if she gets married. She should ask Allaah to conceal
it and to grant her a way out.
Her father is a criminal who should be advised,
rebuked and deterred.
We ask Allaah to keep us all safe and sound.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
26231: Ruling on bringing a servant into the home
Question:
What is the ruling if a wife asks for a servant to help
her, especially when she is a student and has a child, and
her family and her husband's family are not in the same
city? Please note that the husband has a sufficient income
and that when the wife was still living at home, her
family had servants. She needs someone to help her. Please
also note that she will require the servant to wear
proper Islamic dress and to adhere to the limits set by
sharee'ah. Please answer us, may Allaah reward you with good.
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
In the earliest days, the Muslims used to have
slaves, female and male, who used to serve them. Slavery
was abolished [in Saudi Arabia] in 1386 AH, and there are
no slaves any more. The people began to bring
female servants from some other countries such as
the Philippines, Sri Lanka etc. In this situation the
people had no choice but to bring servants. It is permissible for
a woman to bring a servant, but she should make sure
that she is a Muslim and that she is trustworthy and there
is no fear of her causing harm, and that she adheres to
the rulings of Islam, is modest and observes hijaab; she
should avoid meeting men, and if any man enters the house
she should wear hijaab as women do in front of
non-mahram men. Bringing such a servant should be the matter
of necessity, and when the wife is able to do without
her, she should be sent back to her family. (If these
conditions are met), then it is permissible to bring servants
according to need.
Shaykh `Abd-Allaah ibn Jibreen (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
20044: Can he delay Hajj because of problems with
his wife?
Question:
I am speaking on behalf of my brother. He is planning
to do Hajj this year, but for the following reason he
is confused about whether he should do so.
Unfortunately he is on bad terms with his wife and they are not
living together. He is living with his parents and she is
living alone with their son. Since his marital problems
remain unresolved-i.e. he has not divorced her and neither
are they living happily together, he is unsure whether it
is right for him to leave his problems unresolved and
do Hajj. Could you please give some advice on the matter.
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
When a Muslim is able to do Hajj, he should hasten to
do it, and it is not permissible for him to delay it for no
reason, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said: "Hasten to do Hajj _ i.e., the
obligatory Hajj _ for none of you knows what will happen to
him." (Narrated by Ahmad, 2721; classed as saheeh by
al-Albaani in al-Irwa', 990). And he (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever wants to do
Hajj, let him hasten to do so."
(Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi
Dawood, 1524).
What you have mentioned about your brother's
problems is not a reason for delaying Hajj, because Hajj will
not prevent him from dealing with this problem, since it
is within his power to try to solve this problem and
finish with it before he goes for Hajj. His Hajj may be the
means of his problem being solved, because of the help
from Allaah it may bring and the blessing (barakah) of
Hajj and obedience to Allaah. It may be that he will make
du'aa' during his Hajj with regard to this matter, and Allaah
will answer and relieve him of this distress.
Moreover, our advice to your brother is that he
should not hasten to divorce his wife, rather he should take
his time and not rush into anything. For divorce is
something that Allaah dislikes.
If the problem between him and his wife is because
of negligence on her part regarding one of the duties
towards Allaah, such as if she neglects to pray or is not
chaste, etc, then he has to warn her and remind her about
Allaah, and call her to Allaah, and try to guide her to obey
Allaah. If she persists in not responding to him, then in that
case there is nothing to be gained by keeping her.
But if the problem between them is of the common
type of problems between spouses, and has to do
with differences of opinion concerning day to day life
and household matters, etc., then he has to be patient and
treat her kindly, and try hard to correct what he thinks
is inappropriate. For Allaah says (interpretation of
the meaning):
"and live with them honourably. If you dislike them,
it may be that you dislike a thing and Allaah brings
through it a great deal of good" [al-Nisa'
4:19]
The husband has to live with his wife honourably
and keep her company in a good way, refraining from
harming her, and treating her kindly. Living with her
honourably also means putting up with any annoyance that his
wife may cause him, and he should remember that he will
have a great reward for that from Allaah.
A man may dislike his wife, but he keeps her out
of obedience to Allaah and treats her kindly, and then
Allaah brings about a great deal of good from that. He may
be blessed with righteous children from her who will
benefit him in this world and in the Hereafter; or his dislike
may be taken away and replaced with love, as often happens.
The Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said: "No believing man should hate a
believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics he
will be pleased with another." (Narrated by Muslim,
1469). What this means is that it is not appropriate for a
believing man to hate a believing woman, because even if he
finds some bad characteristic in her for which he may
dislike her, he will find another, praiseworthy, characteristic
for which he will love her, such as her being chaste or
kind or obedient, or some other good characteristic. The
same is true of all people, each person has some good
attributes and some bad attributes. As the poet said:
"Who is there that is pleasing in all his characteristics?
It is enough honour for a man's faults to be few enough
to count."
The wise man is the one who weighs up both the
good characteristics and the bad.
Your brother should make a lot of du'aa' in the
places and at the times when du'aa' is especially
encouraged, during Hajj and otherwise, asking that Allaah
may reconcile him with his wife and create love between
their hearts.
And Allaah knows best. May Allaah bestow blessings
and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad.
Islam Q&A Sheikh Muhammed Salih
Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
26333: Her sister mistreated her _ should she forsake her?
Question:
I am a 19-year-old girl. I have lost my father and
my mother, and have become very withdrawn and
introverted. Everyone tells me that I have changed a lot. I always
sit in my room and not with my sisters. I have a sister
at home who is one year older than me, but I do not talk
to her for many reasons, which only shyness prevents
me from mentioning… She has hurt me a great deal with
her words, and I cannot stand it, so I have cut off
my relationship with her even though we live in the
same house. This has gone on for months. We do not eat
together or meet at any other time, each of us lives alone …
My question is: is my not speaking to her a kind of
cutting off the ties of kinship, and is there any sin on me for
that? Note that I felt at peace after that, and that was all
I wanted?
We have a kaafir female servant, and if I ask her
for something she throws it at me in a very rude manner.
She only does this with me. If I tell her off and rebuke her,
is there any sin on me for that?
What is Witr prayer _ how many rak'ahs is it and
how and when is it to be done?
How many rak'ahs are there in Taraaweeh prayer? Is
it permissible to hold the Mus-haf whilst praying, or
a notebook containing du'aa's?
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah, and blessings and peace be upon
the Messenger of Allaah.
We ask Allaah to compensate you with the best of
that with which He compensates His slaves who are
patient, and to expand your heart, and to make things easier
for you, and to improve your relationship with your
family, for He is All-Hearing, Ever-Near.
With regard to your forsaking your sister, if that is
because she is doing something that goes against sharee'ah,
and your forsaking her will achieve some purpose for you,
by keeping you safe from her evil and harm, or it will
achieve some purpose for her, by influencing her and making
her give up her sin, then there is nothing wrong with it.
But if it is for some personal reasons, or for
some difference of opinion over some worldly matters, such
as some family problems, then it is not permissible to
forsake her or cut off ties with her. If you greet her with
salaams, then you are no longer regarded as having forsaken
her. That does not necessarily mean that you have to spend
a lot of time with her or talk to her a lot, especially if
such contact will not serve any purpose for you or for her.
We advise you to try to get to know some good
and righteous women by attending gatherings of good
women, such as classes to memorize Qur'aan and the like, so
that they can be a good help to you in doing good, and a
means of warding off this introversion of which you
complain, and so that you may benefit from their knowledge
and activities.
We also advise you to try to benefit from your free
time by listening to useful tapes and reading useful books
which will increase you in faith and knowledge.
With regard to the servant who is falling short in her
work and mistreating you, there is nothing wrong with
you rebuking her and disciplining her in a manner
appropriate to her misbehaviour and in a manner that will
improve her, without transgressing the limits or harming her.
With regard to the rulings on Witr and Taraaweeh
prayers, you will find the answers to your questions in the
Seasonal Topics section of this website, under the heading
"Night Prayer during Ramadaan."
If you want more information, please see look under
the category: Fiqh (jurisprudence and Islamic rulings)
> Ibaadaat (acts of worship) > Salaah (prayer) _ Salaat
al-Naafilah (Supererogatory prayer) > Qiyaam
al-Layl (prayers at night), in the subIslam & Muslims tree.
Under Question no. 1255 you will find an answer concerning carrying the Mus-haf during night prayers.
With regard to carrying a book of du'aa's whilst
praying Taraaweeh, there is nothing wrong with that, but it is
better to try to memorize some of the du'aa's and recite
them during your prayer. This is more conducive to thinking
of the meaning of the du'aa' and not moving too much
whilst praying.
We ask Allaah to help you to do that which is good and
to keep you away from evil and its people… Ameen.
Praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the Worlds.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
21843: Can Muslims be affected by psychological problems?
Question:
Is it possible for a Muslim to be afflicted
with psychological problems? (Because some people say
that a Muslim cannot be affected by psychological problems).
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
Undoubtedly man may be afflicted with
psychological problems such as worries about the future and grief
over the past. Psychological problems affect the body
more than physical problems do. We should know that
the worries and distress that affect a person are among
the things that expiate his sins and reduce the burden of
sin; if he is patient and seeks reward with Allaah, he will
be rewarded for that.
Treating these problems in the ways prescribed in
Islam is more effective than treating them with
physical medicine, as is well known.
One of the treatments prescribed in Islam is to recite
the du'aa's narrated from the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) to relieve worries and
distress, for example, the saheeh hadeeth narrated from
Ibn Mas'ood (may Allaah be pleased with him): "There
is no-one who is afflicted by distress and grief, and
says: `Allaahumma inni `abduka ibn `abdika ibn
amatija naasyati bi yadika, maada fiyya hukmuka, `adlun
fiyya qadaa'uka. As'aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka
sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu fi kitaabika aw
`allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista'tharta bihi fi `ilm
il-ghayb `indaka an taj'al al-Qur'aana al-`Azeema rabee'
qalbi wa noor sadri wa jalaa' huzni wa dhihaab
hammi (O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of
Your maidservant; my forelock is in Your hand, Your
command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me
is just. I ask You by every name belonging to You
which You have named Yourself with, or revealed in Your
Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You
have preserved in the knowledge of the Unseen with You,
that You make the Holy Qur'aan the life of my heart and
the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and
a release for my anxiety),' but Allaah will take away
his distress and grief." This is one of the remedies
prescribed in sharee'ah. One may also say:
"Laa ilaaha illa anta, subhaanaka inni kuntu min
al-zaalimeen (There is no god but You, glorified (and exalted) are You, truly I have
been of the wrongdoers)." [cf. al-Anbiya' 21:87]
Another form of treatment is ruqya with which a
person may treat himself _ which is better. The Messenger
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to do
ruqyah for himself by reciting al-Mi'wadhatayn (the last
two soorahs of the Qur'aan) when he went to sleep, then
he would wipe his face and whatever he could of his
body. Or a person may go to someone whose
religious commitment he trusts to do ruqyah for him.
If he wants to know more, he can refer to what the
scholars have written about du'aa' such as al-Waabil
al-Sayyib by Ibn al-Qayyim, al-Kalim
al-Tayyib by Shaykh al-Islam,
al-Adhkaar by al-Nawawi, and Zaad
al-Ma'aad by Ibn al-Qayyim.
From the fatwas of al-Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen,
Kitaab Fataawa Islamiyyah, vol. 4, p. 465-467.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
20159: Will the one who suffers from waswaas be rewarded, and what should he do?
Question:
Will the one who suffers from waswaas
(insinuating whispers from the Shaytaan) be rewarded? What
should he do?
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
Allaah says in Soorat al-Naas (interpretation of
the meaning):
"Say: I seek refuge with (Allaah) the Lord of mankind,
The King of mankind —
The Ilaah (God) of mankind,
From the evil of the whisperer (devil who whispers
evil in the hearts of men) who withdraws (from his
whispering in one's heart after one remembers Allaah).
Who whispers in the hearts of mankind.
Of jinn and men."[al-Naas 114:1-6]
Muslim (132) narrated that Abu Hurayrah said:
"Some of the companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him) came to him and said, `We find
things in our hearts that none of us would dare to utter out
loud.' He said, `Do you really find that?' They said, `Yes.'
He said, `That is clear faith.'"
Muslim (3203) narrated that `Uthmaan ibn
Abi'l-`Aas came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) and said: "O Messenger of Allaah, the
Shaytaan is coming between me and my prayer and making
me confused in my recitation." The Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
"That is a devil called Khanzab. If you feel his presence,
then seek refuge with Allaah from him and spit drily to
your left three times." [`Uthmaan] said: "I did that and
Allaah took him away from me."
Al-Bukhaari (3276) and Muslim (134) narrated that
Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said:
"The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said: `The Shaytaan comes to some of you
and says, "Who created such and such? Who created
such and such?" _ until he says, "Who created your Lord?"
If that happens, then let him seek refuge with Allaah
and stop thinking about that.'"
Al-Bukhaari (1231) and Muslim (389) narrated that
Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said:
"The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said: `When the call for prayer is given,
the Shaytaan runs away, breaking wind loudly so as not
to hear the adhaan. When the adhaan ends, he comes
back. When the iqaamah is made, he runs away, then when
the iqaamah ends, he comes back to distract a man from
his prayer, saying, "Remember such and such," things
that the man did not remember, until he does not know
how many rak'ahs he has prayed. If one of you does not
know how many rak'ahs he has prayed, whether it is three
or four, then let him do two prostrations whilst he is sitting."
Muslim (571) narrated that Abu Sa'eed al-Khudri
said: "The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said, `If one of you is uncertain about
his prayer and cannot remember how many rak'ahs he
has prayed, whether it was three or four, then let him
avoid doubt and act upon that of which he is certain, then
let him do two prostrations before he says the salaam.
Then if he prayed five rak'ahs then they will make his
prayer even, and if he prayed four then that will annoy
the Shaytaan."
These aayahs and ahaadeeth show just how keen
the Shaytaan is to lead the sons of Adam astray and stop
them from worshipping their Lord, by means of the
waswaas (whispers) which he instills in their hearts. But the
way to save oneself from these devilish whispers is made
clear. For some people the matter may go so far that they
have doubts about every act of worship they try to do,
whether they have even done it or not. The question here is
not whether such a person is to blame, rather the question
is whether a person will be rewarded for his striving
against the Shaytaan and his efforts to resist these whispers,
or not.
There is no clear statement from the scholars on
this matter, but it may be understood from the words of
the two Shaykhs, Ibn Taymiyyah and Ibn al-Qayyim
(may Allaah have mercy on them), that he will be rewarded
for that. This is what is to be understood from the texts
quoted above, as we shall see below.
In the first hadeeth, the Sahaabah asked the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) about the
waswaas that they felt in their hearts, and he said, "That is
clear faith." Shaykh al-Islam (Majmoo'
al-Fataawa, 7/282) said: "In other words, the fact that this waswaas
was happening and they disliked it so much and pushed it
away from their hearts is clear faith, like the mujaahid to
whom the enemy comes and he resists him until he defeats
him, and this is the greatest form of jihad. Clear (sareeh)
means pure, like pure milk. It becomes clear and pure
because they hated those devilish whispers and warded them
off, so their faith became pure and clear."
He also said (Majmoo' al-Fataawa, 14/108):
"This waswasah is something that enters the heart not
by a person's choice, and if a person hates it and shuns
it, this hatred of it is clear faith."
He also said (Majmoo' al-Fataawa, 22/608):
"Many of the scholars said: hating that, disliking it
and shunning it is clear faith. Praise be to Allaah that the
most the Shaytaan can do is whisper, for when the jinn-devil
is defeated, it whispers (waswasa) and when the human
devil is defeated he lies. Waswaas affects everyone who
tries to focus on Allaah in his worship and dhikr etc. So
one has to be steadfast and patient and persist in dhikr
or prayer; he should not feel distressed because if he
persists, that will divert the plot of the Shaytaan away from
him, for the plot of the Shaytaan is weak."
And he said in Dar' al-Ta'aarud, 3/318:
"This waswaas may be gotten rid of by seeking
refuge with Allaah and ignoring it, so that if [the Shaytaan]
says, `you did not wash your face,' you should say, `Yes, I
did wash my face;' if he thinks that he did not form
the intention (for prayer) or say Allaahu akbar, he should
say in his heart, `Yes I did form the intention and say
Allaahu akbar.' He should cling steadfastly to the truth and
ward off the waswaas that goes against it, so that the
Shaytaan will see how strong and steadfast he is in adhering to
the truth, and will leave him alone. Otherwise when he
[the Shaytaan] sees that he is influenced by doubts
and responsive to waswaas, he will send him more
waswaas until he will be unable to resist and his heart will
become receptive to the seductive whispers of the devils of
the jinn and of mankind, and he will move from one thing
to another until the Shaytaan drives him to his doom.
Based on the above, we may say that a man will
be rewarded for resisting this waswaas and for
striving against the Shaytaan for a number of reasons:
1 _ The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) praised the feeling of hatred towards the
waswaas that had to do with doubts concerning belief
(`aqeedah), when he said, "That is clear faith." One of things
implied by the hatred of this waswaas is that one turns away
from it and does not get carried away with it.
2 _ Obeying the command of the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him), "Let him stop it."
3 _ The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said concerning the prostration of
forgetfulness (sajdat al-sahw): "They will annoy the Shaytaan."
This implies encouragement to annoy and humiliate
the Shaytaan. Annoying him here means turning away
from this waswaas and not paying any attention to it. This is
in addition to the fact that Allaah and His Messenger
have taught us to seek refuge with Allaah from the
Shaytaan, etc.
4 _ The difficulties and distress that the believer may
suffer as a result of this waswaas may be included in the
hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him), "No Muslim suffers tiredness, exhaustion,
worry, grief, annoyance or distress, not even a thorn that
pricks him, but Allaah will expiate some of his sins thereby."
(al-Bukhaari, 2573; Muslim, 5642).
5 _ Shaykh al-Islam (Ibn Taymiyah _ may Allaah
have mercy on him) said: "like the mujaahid to whom
the enemy comes and he resists him until he defeats him,
and this is the greatest form of jihad." The fact that he
likens him to a mujaahid and describes this as the greatest
form of jihad may be understood to mean that he will
be rewarded for that.
And Allaah knows best. May Allaah bless our
Prophet Muhammad and all his family and companions.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
20152: He likes a girl but his father refuses to let
him marry her
Question:
Recently I went to XXXX . My parents decided to
propose to someone else without asking me. Both the girl and
I disagreed. And I think that was the end of that
issue.While I was there, I met a girl, who I really liked. I didn't talk
to this girl that I really liked. Because I considered it
wrong. And I let my elders know about it. Everyone agreed.
They were all happy. When news got to my father, he
expressed extreme disapproval. Blamed me for having a love
story. He mentioned that this girl was not good for me
because of her family, Which by the way is our family.
Considering she's a distant cousin. But, more specifically he
meant her parents( who are divorced). He said that this
was something to look down on. The girl had
apparently recieved other proposals that she had turned down.
Who were from people that either didn't have degree's,
were much older than her, or were legally blind. And that
was something for him to look down on even more.
Another reason he gave me was that I didn't have a degree,
which didn't seem to be the problem when he was proposing
to some other girl without asking me. Recently, I found
out through my cousins, that the girl I liked, Likes me as
well. And she would like to marry me. Her grandmother
would also like us to get married. I think it's hard for alot
of muslim guys in the U.S. to say they avoided
temptation while living here. Well, I managed to avoid it. My
parents know, that I haven't done anything of this sort. At
the time, I'm not ready to get married. But, I'd like to
get engaged. Because I don't want to loose this person.
How should I convince my father, who I consider a
pious person. He prays, and is a good muslim. But, the
reasoning he gave me for not getting married.. Is his
reasoning. Which I feel is morally and islamically wrong. My
mother is afraid to talk to him, because he has a temper.
And does not like to listen to people. Also, has a heart
situation. Please help?
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
Shaykh `Abd-Allaah ibn Humayd (may Allaah have
mercy on him) was asked about a man marrying a woman
whom he likes without his family's approval. He said:
There is nothing wrong with that, if the woman is
steadfast in her religious commitment and chastity, and if she
is compatible with you in terms of family background.
There is nothing to stop you marrying her, even though
your parents do not approve, if their objections and dislike
of her are unjust and unfounded. If you want to marry
her, and she is chaste, religiously-committed, guards
her honour and has a good reputation and family
background, then there is nothing wrong with that. It is not
considered disobedience to one's parents if you go against
your parents' wishes and marry her, so long as their
objections are not justly based and are rather based on whims
and desires or psychological reasons. But if their
objections towards her are just and well-founded, then you
should not go ahead and marry her. And Allaah knows
best. Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn Humayd (may Allaah have
mercy on him), p. 217. (www.islam-qa.com)
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20162: She married her boyfriend and is living a
miserable life with him
Question:
I left home at XXX and married my XXX yr old
college boyfriend ( I know it was wrong please don't judge me)
i now live with his family and have a little 1 yr old
girl. The problem is I want to try and bring my daughter up
as religiously as possible I maybe destined for hell but i
do not wish to drag my daughter with me. I feel that
my husband is not giving me this opportunity or his
family. They care about my daughter but constantly listen to
music and watch tv I hate this because my daughter is
begining to enjoy this sort of thing and do not want my
daughter exposed to this. The main problem is I regret
marrying my husband with all my heart I feel that he regrets
it too.We argue All the time about his family and money.
I can't stand talking to him because he is always
miserable and does not know where he is going in life or what he
is to do. he can't hold a job because he gets `bored' easily
i work and so does he but he still can't even provide for
us he spends all his money and can not answer for it. I
have to provide for me and my daughter and on most
occasions for him we earn the same amount and yet I am able
to save for the future while he spends it like water.he
behaves as if he were a single person with no worries,The
only reason we are together is because of my daughter. I
wish i could leave because I am so unhappy I am a wreck.
i have lost all self esteem. I went for sweet
talk/excitment in a man rather then religion and character and i
realise now that this is the most important thing in a man
because a man who follows religion correctly and is of
good character is a better husband.
I myself am a weak muslim i need someone to guide
me and although my husband went to Madrasha he does
not bother with religion and right and wrong of religion.
he wants me to slave for him and his family and does
not care for what i want. I want to know what Islam
says about us being together. Does my happiness count at
all because I see a very bleak future with my husband. but
i know i can not cope without my family who will
probably disown me if I left my husband. But they understand
that i am going through alot. we seperated for awhile and
I stayed with my family but he came back apolagising
this was a few months ago. I care for my husband
because once we were sort of happy but we have lost each
other we have lost the love and friendship we once had. I
don't think we will get that back. We live together but
lead almost separate lives.
Please advise me as to what I can do for my future
and the future of my daughter. I do not want to deprive her
of her father but my marriage is a unhappy one believe me.
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
The story you tell in your question in and of itself offers
a serious lesson to every girl who follows her whims
and desires, fails to obey Allaah and leaves her family
and her home in order to commit sin in an atmosphere
of fitnah. Your question also offers a lesson to every
sinner, to look at the consequences to which their sin may
lead them. We ask Allaah to forgive us, you and every
Muslim man and woman.
With regard to the marriage contract between you
and him, if it was not done in the presence of your
guardian and with his approval _ which is what seems to be
the case _ then it is not valid, and it is haraam for you to
stay with him in this case or to let him be intimate with
you, because he is not your husband. The Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, "There is
no marriage (nikaah) without a guardian (wali)." And
he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
"Any woman who gets married without the permission of
her guardian, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is
invalid, her marriage is invalid."
I advise you to do a number of things:
1 _ You must ask him to put this matter right, by
making a new marriage contract with you, with a mahr
(dowry) and the presence of your guardian and two
witnesses. From what you say it seems that your family now
approve of your marriage to him. So there is nothing to
prevent you putting this haraam situation right. If that is not
done then he is not your husband, and it is haraam for you
to stay with him.
2 _ I advise you to be patient and to seek reward
with Allaah for the difficulties and stress that you are
facing. For these difficulties will be an expiation for your
previous sins. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said: "No worry or grief befalls a believer, not
even a thorn that pricks him, but Allaah will expiate
thereby some of his sins." Your patience will end in a way out,
in sha Allah. As the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: "The way out comes with patience."
3 _ Note that unpleasant things only happen to
people because of their sins. Allaah says (interpretation of
the meaning):
"And whatever of misfortune befalls you, it is because
of what your hands have earned. And He pardons much"
[al-Shoora 42:30]
The difficulties and unhappiness that you are
going through may be a punishment from Allaah for
your disobeying your family and committing this
haraam action. But your regret and putting this matter right,
in sha Allaah, will be your repentance, for the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Regret
is repentance." I hope that Allaah will take away from
you, as a result of this repentance, the worry and distress
that you are feeling.
4 _ Make a lot of du'aa' and feel that you are in need
of Allaah and have no one else to turn to. Allaah
says (interpretation of the meaning):
"Is not He (better than your gods) Who responds to
the distressed one, when he calls on Him, and Who
removes the evil…?"[al-Naml 27:62]
"And your Lord said: "Invoke Me [i.e. believe in
My Oneness (Islamic Monotheism) and ask Me for
anything] I will respond to your (invocation)"[Ghaafir
40:60]
If a person is helped (by Allaah) to make du'aa', then
his prayer will be answered. Make the most of the times
and places where du'aa' is answered, such as when
prostrating, before saying the tasleem at the end of the prayer, in
the last third of the night, and on Fridays, especially
after `Asr prayer.
5 _ You have to advise your husband and cooperate
with him in obeying Allaah. Take him by the hand and start
a new life in which your aim is to please Allaah. May
Allaah help you both to do that which He loves and which
pleases Him. And Allaah knows best.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
20187: Her brother is in love with a divorced woman
with whom he had a previous relationship
Question:
My brother in XXX is in love with a girl, she is
divorced with two kids(boy and a girl more then 4yrs), the
love was between the two before the marriage but after
the marriage made a wall in their love, after divorce they
are more in love and plan to marry, not caring about
the parents, the girl told my brother that, does he still
believe in Allah?, as he had put him through so many test in
life many And like 6 months ago my brother was saying
he wont marry anyone except the girl he loves. First
he wanted to get he acceptance of my mother and so.
But suddenly a change came and now he doesnt care at all
he is changed, his attitiude is quiet rude. My mother still
is good with my brother but his attitude is bad. He is
bad with my father. And I think there is a chance that the
girl might have done some Amal(magic) on my family
and my brother.
So is there a way we can know about wether there is
some black magic done on my brother or not. As my
father doesnt believe in Magic its hard for my father to find
out a Aalim or a Mufti and get the issue solved. Also
please make duaa for his good. He is not keeping in touch
with me , the girl he loves is not liked by our whole
family,and my brother before used to say that its not right to marry
a girl without parents acceptance.
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
I advise your father and the father of this woman not
to prevent this marriage, so long as there is no shar'i
reason to prevent it. If your brother loves this woman and
she loves him, then it is in their interests to get married.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: "There is nothing better for two people who are in
love than marriage," i.e., if a man loves a woman and she
loves him, then let them get married, and that will calm
them down and protect them from doing anything haraam.
Isn't their getting married better for him, for her and for
their families than their falling into something that Allaah
has forbidden? The Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said, addressing the guardians of
women, if a man comes to propose marriage: "If there comes
to you one with whose religious commitment and
character you are pleased, then marry (your daughter) to him;
if you do not do that then there will be fitnah
(tribulation) and widespread corruption on earth."
But if there is a shar'i reason to prevent that, then
our advice to your brother is to obey his father and to
remain chaste, and to strive hard in doing so. The Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
"Whoever strives to be chaste, Allaah will help him to be
chaste," i.e., whoever does his utmost to be chaste, Allaah
will grant him chastity and help him. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"As for those who strive hard in Us (Our Cause), We
will surely guide them to Our paths (i.e. Allaah's religion
— Islamic Monotheism)" [al-`Ankaboot
29:69]
And he should look for another wife who will help
him with his religious commitment and his worldly interests.
With regard to witchcraft, if a person regularly
reads Qur'aan and recites the adhkaar that the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to recite
when going to sleep, when waking up, in the morning and
the evening and at other times and in other
circumstances, then he will protect himself thereby from the
accursed Shaytaan. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said: "Allaah enjoined five things upon
Yahya ibn Zakariyya, which he was to follow and to enjoin
upon the Children of Israel…" then he mentioned them,
among which was: "and He commands you to remember
Him. The likeness of that is of a man who is being pursued
by his enemy, until he comes to a strong fortress where
he protects himself from them. Similarly a person
cannot protect himself against the Shaytaan with anything
better than the remembrance of Allaah (dhikr)."
Al-Mi'wadhaat (soorahs seeking protection with
Allaah) are among the greatest things by means of which a
person may protect himself against witchcraft, so recite them
in the morning and in the evening, after every prayer
and before going to sleep.
Make a lot of du'aa' for your brother, that Allaah
may guide him and grant him wisdom. And Allaah knows best.
Islam Q&A Sheikh Muhammed Salih
Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
22164: Advice on the matter of spinsterhood
Question:
I am disturbed by the number of women in this
society who do not have husbands and I wonder what is
the solution?
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
The phenomenon of widespread spinsterhood
(women remaining without husbands) is caused by a number
of things, including the following:
1 _ Demanding too high a mahr, and the inability of
young men to bear the expenses of marriage.
2 _ Girls refusing to marry early on the grounds that
they want to complete their education.
3 _ Girls refusing to get married to a man who
already has a wife.
4 _ Difficult conditions imposed by the wife's family
or the husband's.
The ways to solve this problem are as follows:
1 _ The girl's family should look for a suitable man
who can make their daughter happy, and not seek to
make excessive demands with regard to the mahr. Rather
they should look for a man who is religiously committed
and has a good character, who will be able to protect
their daughter's religious commitment and chastity, and
make her happy.
2 _ Girls should not refuse to get married on the
excuse that they want to continue their education, so that
they grow old and reach an age where they can find no one
to marry them. It is possible to come to an agreement
with their husbands that they will continue their education
after they get married. That is easy to do, praise be to Allaah.
3 _ A girl should not regard a man who proposes
marriage to her when he already has a wife as unsuitable for her
or unable to make her happy. Many girls refuse to accept
a man who is already married, then time passes and
they get too old and cannot find anyone to marry them.
But Islam and the Sunnah of the Prophet permit a
Muslim man to marry up to four women, on the condition that
the man treat all his wives fairly.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)
Search Inside This Book At Google Book Search - (280 pages)
21171: How should she answer the questions of her
second husband's children?
Question:
I am a divorced woman and I have received a proposal
of marriage from a man who is divorced and has
three children. After thinking long and hard I have decided
to get married to him. But my question is, what should I
say to his children if they ask me, "Why did you get
married to our father?" or "Why did my father divorce
my mother?" There are a lot of questions which they will
ask me. What should I do? I hope that you will do me
the honour of answering. Thank you very much.?
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
Children ask a lot of questions and it is very
important that parents try not to ignore their questions. They
should make use of these questions as a means of teaching
them and developing their thinking and their potentials.
The answers should also be convincing, because
the children's young age makes them convinced by
any answer that they are given. You could explain to them
in simple terms the basics of marriage and divorce.
If there are previous differences between you of
which the children are aware, then you should speak of them
in brief and simple terms.
You could also explain that by saying that you were
not able to agree on some matters regarding living or
the house, or that your ways of looking at things are different.
It is important that you do not accuse their father or
make him responsible, even if in fact he is responsible in
your view, because this will affect the way they look at
their father and make them hate him and keep away from
him. Try as much as possible not to show your negative
feelings towards your former husband, because that will not
help you, rather it will affect your children. It is very
important for them to develop socially in a sound manner, and
to have a positive view of their father.
Shaykh Muhammad al-Duwaysh. (www.islam-qa.com)
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